I am endlessly fascinated by the psychology of sexual fantasies. One in particular – the Fuck Doll fantasy – has captured my imagination and I’d like to sink a little deeper into it. What exactly is the Fuck Doll fantasy? As a curious observer looking in from the outside, the fantasy seems to be about a woman surrendering control and being reduced to nothing more than a sexual object. In essence, she becomes a sex toy – a fuck doll – to be used by her lover and/or other men for their sexual gratification. She is helpless to resist and becomes a receptacle for their pleasure. Of course, in reality, the woman is extremely aroused by this scenario and it is about her pleasure as well.
At first pass, this fantasy might seem a bit shocking to some women…even offensive. I tend to believe that the more intuitive a fantasy is, the more vanilla it is. Most fantasies don’t make sense and that is why they are kinks, not mainstream sexuality. But, if we think deeper about any particular fantasy, even if extreme, we can usually figure out what is happening and why a person might find it erotic.
The first issue that comes to mind for me in this scenario is the woman’s safety. Even though it isn’t talked about or even suggested in the fantasy, we have to remember that the woman is still actually in control. She is doing it because she finds immense arousal and pleasure in the experience. It doesn’t really matter if you or I “don’t get it”. The fantasy is hers, she isn’t hurting anyone, and it makes her hot.
Other kinks share this element of “no control”. Cuckolding is one example I identify with and write a lot about. Submission is a better example that more women may be familiar with. When we think about “subs”, their submission is an erotic gift given to their Dom. The sub giveth power and the sub can taketh away. The cuck, sub, and fuck doll actually hold the power and can stop things at any time. This sense of free will/choice and secretly being in control is what makes the fantasy safe. We just don’t talk about it because it detracts from the fantasy which is fueled by “loss of control”.
Having established the important element of safety and free will, we can now focus on the erotic drivers of the fantasy. We recognize that fantasies are a departure from reality but understanding one’s reality can provides valuable context for why a particular fantasy is hot. It may seem counterintuitive, but I imagine a woman with this fantasy as being a very strong woman. I can hear the question now, “What are you saying, Michael!? A woman that wants to be sexually objectified and treated like cum-hole, fuck doll is a strong woman?” Yes, that is exactly what I’m saying…with one point of clarification.
I’m not saying say all strong women want to be treated this way. But, I’m willing to wager that most women with this fantasy are indeed very strong women. You see, part of the erotic rush for these women comes from inversion. They are very much in control in real life and this fantasy turns their world upside down – they are inverted. They don’t have to think and are able to feel the “sensation” of not being in control. A weight is lifted off their shoulders. There is nothing to think about and no responsibilities that come with being in control. She can just let go and enjoy the pleasure.
Slipping into a mind space where you become what you are not can be a disorienting experience. It takes a strong woman to handle this level of inversion. The moments can be scary but wildly intoxicating. It can become euphoric and transcendent as she is lifted beyond the realm of her day-to-day existence and outside herself.
This transcendent sensation is what the ancient Greeks attributed to the presence of Dionysus – god of divine ecstasy (physical and spiritual), rebirth, wine, and theater. While it comes in many forms, transcendent ecstasy is always the destination and this sensation is the Dionysian Experience (also the title of my blog).
So far, we have touched on safety, free will, and the destination – touching Dionysus (aka, transcendent ecstasy). Perhaps it is time to consider one woman’s description of her Fuck Doll fantasy so we can get a clearer picture. She is a professional single woman who very much fits the “feminist” stereotype and describes her Fuck Doll fantasy like this:
I imagine being stripped of my clothing by a group of men and put on display at their gatherings and parties like I’m a living piece of art. Preferably, I would be blindfolded because it removes my identity and makes me less of a person. Who I am doesn’t matter to them. No, to them I’m nothing more than a fuck doll…a slut with no identity to be used for their pleasure. One after the other or all together, the men would be able to touch and grope me whenever they felt like it.
As the night progresses, I would be taken off display and each man in succession or all at once would pass me around like an object to be used, fucked, and enjoyed. There would be so many men stuffing random cocks in my mouth, pussy, and…even my ass. One after the other, they would cum all over my face, inside me, in my hair, all over my body…wherever they wanted to empty themselves. By the end of the night, I’d be a complete cum-covered mess and made to feel like the true submissive slut I am.
Whew, that story strikes me as very exciting. It isn’t that I see myself as one of those men either. What I personally like about it is that this woman is embracing the fullness of sexuality and her wild, lustful desires. She creates a complex scenario that allows her to get that space but she gets there.
A lot of men with the cuckold fantasy would find it arousing for their lover to have the Fuck Doll fantasy.
I can envision inviting a few male friends over for drinks with plans to feature some interactive art as entertainment. My girlfriend is the art and I have her dolled up in a sexy outfit. It is hot greeting each guy as he arrives and showing off my gorgeous artwork.
Much to their surprise and excitement, I let the men know they are free to interact with the art. “Please feel free to explore her holes. Limit one finger at a time in her ass and feel free to use up to three of your thick fingers in her tight pussy. We’ll open her up more when we take her away from the frame and put her on the bed. Then, we’ll see if we can get two cocks in her pussy at the same time…along with one her ass. I can’t wait for you experience how truly engaging this piece can be.”
Over the course of two hours, I keep her framed. We end up playing drinking games focused on who can make her cum the fastest, make her scream the loudest, and award a prize for who makes her cum the most times. I lost count of how many times she actually came. At one point, her legs were so weak she couldn’t stand up any longer. I put her on her knees. As you might imagine, her mouth became the next hole of focus for our drinking games and cocks. I told the men my art was water proof and easy to clean. “Feel free to cum all over it as many times as you like…just save some for later for the bedroom.”
Here’s a shorter vignette – Dinner Is Served.
I imagine inviting a carefully selected group of men over for dinner who are ultimately coming to “use” and please my girl. I have a wonderful dinner catered and feature my lover as the main course. Once we are set, I step out to the room where the men are gathered and introduce the menu.
“Gentlemen, dinner is served. Tonight’s entree is a juicy, mouth-watering dish of Scandinavian origin. By special request, our main course will be accompanied by an abundance of stuffing along with a creamy and ample supply of gravy which I encourage you to apply liberally. Side dishes are aplenty and sure to satisfy even those with the most discerning tastes. We will round out our dining experience with several decadently delicious deserts and, I trust, you will ensure I have a savory creampie to enjoy. Men, please have a seat. Bon appetite!”
As a man that tends to favor sensuality in my sexual experiences, these fantasies are a bit harsher than I tend to think and write but the fantasy isn’t built around what I want. It is about giving my girl what she wants – the fantasy is hers. I would become the conductor orchestrating an erotic symphony…for her pleasure.
As far as examples go, I’ll leave you with one more reference for additional reading, if interested. I once shared a post called, “The Wall” and backdated it so it would be buried in my archives. Even though, much of it was inspired and informed by a woman, I didn’t know what to make of it or how it would be received. I certainly didn’t want to offend the women that do read my blog. I have since come to appreciate that I had inadvertently stumbled upon the Fuck Doll fantasy. Actually, my discussions with women about The Wall is the inspiration behind this current exploration.
While there are clearly levels of physical pleasure flowing through the Fuck Doll fantasy, there is a lot more going on. I suspect the fantasy is nuanced for each woman but there are several erotic forces at play here. Submission and bondage are frequently referenced by women in these type fantasies. The sexual kink known as Erotic Humiliation is also present in both its physical and mental forms. This is a form of masochism, the “M” in BDSM. You can read more about erotic humiliation here: Erotic Humiliation – Exploring the Layers.
The lady in the example mentioned being displayed like art and groped by men as an erotic trigger. I have seen examples where women describe being turned on when men use them like furniture such as an ottoman or side table. I’ve seen other examples where women are spread out nude on a large dinner table like they are part of the table setting as the men gather around to feast. How humiliating and degrading (and very enjoyable) it must be for a strong, proud woman with this fantasy to be used like this.
Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, I believe the heart of the Fuck Doll fantasy stems from the cognitive dissonance women feel between society’s angelic expectations and her own lustful desires. I explore this concept in some depth in my Hestia vs Aphrodite and in Courtly Love posts. In short, women are often placed upon a pedestal of purity by men and societal expectations. This was done as away to suppress a woman’s innate sexual desires and make her feel shame when she has those sexual desires. I advance the argument that when basic human desires are denied, they often morph and return in different, more extreme forms. Exhibit A – The Fuck Doll fantasy.
Interestingly, it is through submission, bondage, captivity-type fantasies, and the Fuck Doll fantasy that some women feel so alive, liberated, and able to experience the fullness of their sexuality in guilt-free manner. She creates a scene where she has no choice but to surrender to the pleasure she has craved all along. Humiliation play may also be present as a way to eroticize the shame she feels in having these sexual desires.
Thank you for reading the meanderings of an armchair sexual psychologist. If you are a woman that holds this fantasy (and are comfortable discussing it), I hope you share your perspective in the comments section. If you have written about it on your blog, please feel free to share the link.
Not something I have directly written about but it is definitely something I myself am interested in. Touching on just something at the beginning of the post for a moment when you said the fuckdoll, sub and cuckold are all in control was a definite point that I’m glad that you made. Something else I’ve seen through my interactions in the BDSM world that I’ve seen tied to some fuckdoll fantasies is CNC or consensual non-consent and it’s something I’ve somewhat explored off and on. For the record, and I’ve said this before your “The wall” post has been one of my favorites. Definealty enjoyed this piece and it been a fantasy of mine for a while and so it was nice to see something like this today. Hope you are doing well.
-A very fired up Lili
Mmmm, I am relishing this comment and knowing this fantasy excites you. Getting you fired up is always rewarding and gives me quite a lift… 😈I like the notion of CNC. Seems that would allow one to get even deeper into the fuckdoll mind space. 🍑💧 As for The Wall, I think there may be an opening waiting for you and the men are eagerly awaiting your presentation… 😘
I think so too 🙂
I love this fantasy and how it can look to many different women. For me, I tend to fantasize more about a lover using me or giving me away to be used than being an anonymous toy for multiple men. I think it’s because I want the men who use me to know me. Know that I’m smart and capable and that they are damn lucky to be getting the pleasure of my body. Or I want them to think my lover is lucky and that they are extremely lucky to be getting this glimpse into his world. Maybe I just haven’t gotten far enough on my submissive journey for the anonymous fantasy… not sure. The Wall is intriguing and exciting to me because someone who cares for me is there next to me. Maybe it’s a feeling of safety I can’t get past? 🤔 hmm. Thank you Mr. Armchair Psychologist. How can I pay for my session with you? 😉😈
Violette, your visits seem to be leaving me with more and more of an impression 😈You made some great callouts that I didn’t address well…or at all. Your mention of having your lover involved is a great point. I can imagine scenarios where this fantasy is experienced with a lover and not multiple men.🔥 I can imagine how this might play out in a D/s relationship and in cuckolding. Your mention of having your lover present is another gem and, perhaps, point of differentiation in how different women experience the fantasy. It wasn’t present in the woman’s example but I seemed to have built one where the woman’s man was present. That does seem to create and added layer of safety and, I suspect, some erotic emotional intensity as well. 💖🔥As for payment…I’m considering my measured response now 😛😈
Hmm, I wonder if your…response…will be adequate. 😈 Perhaps you should invite a colleague to weigh in.. 😋
I think the thing about this fantasy and really every fantasy, is that there can be so many layers added on. For a lover to use me as he wishes, that’s the fuckdoll fantasy and it’s so hot for me to know I’m giving my lover so much pleasure in my submission. Then add in my lover’s friends and you’ve got hotwife and cuckolding. I particularly love this fantasy of being given to his friends that may have admired me from afar and are probably beside themselves at getting a taste of me now. And I imagine from my lover’s pov that he must be feeling proud and hot and crazy at watching his beloved being taken by men he’s known forever. Mmm 🔥 I definitely do like the added emotions of being known by the men who are getting to use me. Makes it hotter for me. 😈
Now… about that response.. 😉
Sorry for the slow reply, it seems I was holding onto my response – you seem to have that effect on men! After reading your writings and how you enjoy the fullness of a big cock, I think having a more endowed colleague join would be an appropriate measure to ensure your needs are fully attended to 😈🔥I love what you shared her about the connection of the fantasy to submission with the added layer of hotwife/cuckolding…especially with men that know you. I enjoyed reading your take on that works in your thoughts…knowing they have been craving and now get to experience you and the pride your man will feel about you. ✨From the male’s perspective, I know this would be even more intense because men I know would be fucking my lover. It strikes me as even more erotic than having the experience with strangers. I suppose it is because I would see those men again and the erotic dynamic is now changed – so many hot scenarios can spin off from this. The fantasy is now more public, than private. This is probably worth a whole post to think through, ha! Thanks so much for sharing your experience and the thought provoking comment 💫
This has been a fantasy of mine for quite awhile. It feels odd to me that I would want something like this. But I think you’re right, it must have something to do with this…
“They are very much in control in real life and this fantasy turns their world upside down – they are inverted. They don’t have to think and are able to feel the “sensation” of not being in control. A weight is lifted off their shoulders. There is nothing to think about and no responsibilities that come with being in control. She can just let go and enjoy the pleasure.”
When I read that, it struck a cord with me because this is exactly how I feel. I’m so tired of being in control, and I just want to be used sometimes. I know I can decide at any time to take back my control, but sometimes I just want someone else to take it from me for awhile. I’m tired of having to constantly think about everything and make all the decisions in my life. I also enjoy being able to give myself over to someone. There is so much power to be found in being able to grant someone their own fantasy. If I can give that to someone, then it’s the ultimate thrill for me. I get so much pleasure out of giving pleasure, and the funny thing is, I think this all stems from my childhood. My mother never accepted anything I did as good enough. And maybe that’s why when a man accepts what I’m giving him and takes great pleasure from it, I respond in such a positive way. I’m finally getting the acceptance that I could never get. It’s weird how things that happened to us as children, somehow affect how we are as adults. But it’s the only thing that makes logical sense to me.
I must admit, I was really hoping you would weigh in on this topic. I was excited to see your comment and couldn’t wait to read it…anticipating how you would react to it. You had my full attention (and I do mean full 😉) from the start when you shared it was a fantasy of yours 🔥Thank you for sharing how you think about it…it adds to the subject in a truly meaningful way and will surely help other women who might have this fantasy but aren’t sure how to express it or even get their own mind around this perhaps confusing desire. Being able to let go (even for a night) does seem to resonate. It sounds like we share something in common around getting immense pleasure from making someone else’s fantasy a reality. I know I feel that way with cuckolding. Even though she would be with another man, it is an erotic gift for each of us. 💝I would also enjoy being there orchestrating my lover’s Doll fantasy – pleasure in giving 🔥 I’m sorry about your lack of acceptance as a child and feeling about not being good enough. It seems to me you’ve turned that into a positive and are a giving person today and find pleasure in that. Hopefully, that same energy is returned to you and that you can accept the same pleasure you give. Thanks again for the thoughtful comment – it is a gift. 😘
This has been a fantasy of mine for many years — and yes, I am one of those women that are in complete control of my professional and personal life. But like Violette, I prefer that the men that “enjoy/use” me know me personally and admire my strengths and sexuality. Thank you for giving so much thought into this area of female fantasy, Michael.
Dana, thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your thoughts on this fantasy. It is always a genuine pleasure to feel your energy 😘 I appreciate the callout on being “known” by the men. Being known or specifically wanting anonymity seems to be a interesting point of differentiation in the fantasy. I should probably think a bit more on that one. 🤔I have always seen you as a strong, sexy woman and it is hot that you have this fantasy 🔥Stay safe out there 💫
This is also my fantasy, somewhat different then you described, as each person is unique. I have written about it here and there on my blog… maybe not so graphically. Maybe I should. 🤔
Thanks so much for visiting and adding to the conversation, Minnie. Please feel free to add a link or two if you like. You write so thoughtfully on topics, and I would be interested in reading more on how it plays for you. I would certainly enjoy you sharing a more graphic version too…guess that is the man in me 😛
I saw something like this when I explored a sex club in Vegas. It was…interesting. I got no joy or excitement from it, but to watch others do made it the more curiouser. I think you need to get yourself in a certain frame of mind to perform with a doll.
Have you shared you sex club visit? That would be a fun read 😈 It is interesting how we sometimes see something we might have never really thought about and then the curiosity begins to build. That’s what happened to me with this. It does seem like this fantasy requires getting into a certain frame of mind because the women are often in a different mindset during their day-to-day life. It is probably like a wonderful, erotic escape.🔥
Hmm…I don’t think I have shared about it 🤔 I’m sure I mentioned it, maybe? Topic for my next post, perhaps! 😃
I think it is very normal for a man to be excited by a sex doll. When men are horny they need a woman. Most women are complicated and destroy every pleasure. So men often use prostitutes who simply do what they want. My wife Vanta ist often just used for sex by her clients. This is totally normal. Generally speaking in Asia women are more submissive. So they are like sex dolls you can use. For men that is great!
This is a challenging comment to respond to because the mindset between fantasy and reality is hard to distinguish and it is focused on the man’s experience. Since this is a more thoughtful post about the psychology of this fantasy “for women”, I will try to keep it real. Personally, I don’t think women “destroy” every pleasure. In my opinion, they “create” pleasure. There is no denying that prostitution is thriving today as it has throughout the ages. The reasons are many – no emotional commitment and doing what the man wants – being among those you shared. Fantasy exploration for men is another. I agree that in terms of stereotypes, submissive Asian females seems to exist as one of them. In reality though, there are plenty of strong Asian women and like many women, being submissive may be a way for a woman to relax and enjoy sex in a more guilt-free manner because she is pleasing her man. It frees her from the cultural restraints that dictate she conduct herself in a more angelic way…especially in terms of sexuality. You write that your wife is like a sex doll and this post is about why “she” enjoys it rather than why men enjoy it. Has she ever described why she enjoys so much? I’d love to hear 😈
I guess we are mainly talking about cultural differences. Here in Asia sex is not seen as something so special. It is normal. Everybody is doing it. It is something like eating or drinking.
Men are known for being naughty or dirty. It is seen as natural. A man simply has needs. Of course a woman too, but the role play is clear. Men want sex and women provide it. So they just lay down and let it happen. Fun for them and for the men. Once you know a woman better, she will request what she likes.
I feel like we are talking about different things here but appreciate the reply.
Personally, I find the craving for an M/s relationship as an extension of this type of fantasy. It helps to remove any guilty pleasure I might experience by being ‘of use’ in any way He so chooses. And yes, outside of His orders I am always in complete and utter control, of everything. It can be exhausting – even to the strongest of us. Nice post! 🙂
Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your perspective on this – really appreciate it! 😊This is a great callout too. I can see how M/s relationships set a great stage for allowing a woman to experience this – guilt free. She is doing what her Dom, Daddy, or Master commands and experiences the pleasure in that and the pleasure of other men. It is a very hot situation 🔥
Hi Michael, i just wanted to clarify, in both my life and fantasies, my dominant is the only one who gets to ‘play’. I should have made that clearer. Bear does not/and has no desire to share me, the fantasy of being a ‘thing of pleasure’ is for me to only one man, not many, although i can understand the appeal intellectually.
We have, from the beginning of our adventure, both known that our adventure is monogamous only. We may share what you would call an M/s relationship but the fact remains that anything outside of monogamy would be a hard no, for both of us.
The guilt free pleasure here comes not from ‘how many are involved’ but simply in the acts themselves, many things that my mind would otherwise put a stop to because of ‘proper’ behaviour. (I suppose my comments are more ‘in addition too’ than on topic!) LoL
Basically (after reading your last thread in comments) if he asked me to, even as a Master, the answer is still no. I don’t believe the lifestyle should be equal to losing one’s own compass in life. Even as his ‘s’ ….
Thanks for circling back on this. Reading your initial response, it was an error on my part to include “other men” in my reply – you didn’t suggest that. As you described, there are many aspects of this fantasy that are still in play…even when experienced within the confines of a monogamous relationship. So glad elements of this fantasy resonated and really appreciate you contributing your perspective on it plays out in an erotic way for you two.
Oh wow, I never knew how commonplace this fantasy was! I’ve read a handful of eroticas with scenes like this in them, and while the fictional scenes are hot, the idea of anyone but my Master putting their hands or cocks anywhere near me repulses me.
Thank you for giving it a read. I agree that fantasy and reality can leave one with very different feelings. Some might even feel the same way about Master/slave relationships or, in my case, the cuckold fantasy. I wonder though…how would this play out for you if your Master (not that he would…just asking “if”) wanted you to experience this?
Very interesting 🤔..
Anything new always intrigues the mind and causes a stimulating effect..
So I can fully understand your curiosity in indulgence in this particular doll…
Love how you interpret and how you go into details of it all
Thank you sexy Nita 😘 This one was more of an observation and curiosity about a fantasy some women have. I think I learned a bit while researching it and the sexy women who shared their naughty thoughts in the comments. 🔥
Heaven or Hell? [reacting to featured image]
For the women that harbor this fantasy, I believe they would characterize it as a transcendent experience… Thanks for checking it out.
👍 first point of art grab the viewers attention mission accomplished
Now that’s cute. Fuck doll indeed [reacting to featured image]
Yes indeed 🔥
Also like that she’s not just legs, a pussy and an ass sticking out a hole in the wall. She’s got a picture with her face on it. Makes her seem human and not totally an object. Or objectifying her more. Goes both ways. But that’s because my inner sadist reminded me that I’m a sadist and a professional bastard and scoundrel, so there you go. ;P
I wish … [reacting to featured image]
Mmmm, I imagine you have had even better 🔥
Never like that, but I hope to be given the chance to try it one day.
Yes. All of this. I appreciate how well thought out all of this is. I consider myself a strong, independent woman and at the same time I’m all about the fucktoy fantasy. I actually write about it, too. Yum!
So glad to hear this resonates with a woman that craves this. If I haven’t read that particular post, I look forward to reading it.😈🔥 It is such an erotic journey! Please feel free to add a link here so others can check it out. Thanks again for sharing your reaction.
I have read this post before but I’m circling back on it now because of the new series I’m writing, I created my own version of the fuck doll fantasy because I had read somewhere about people who dress up as dolls and want to live like Barbie basically. I took that thought process and ran with it. I confess, it isn’t something I would do myself, either your version(s) or my own, but, what interests me is that I am aroused by the idea of controlling a doll to the degree you display in your version(s) and also the way my character controls them in my own version.
As kinks go, I would say that the fuck doll fantasy is right out there on the edge but if a person (apparently a lot of men have the living doll fantasy with themselves as the doll) wants to feel like they have that level of power/control stripped away from them, then I would imagine they have an exceptionally strong mind, you would have to have, there is no way you could deal with the various aspects and layers of the fantasy of the controller otherwise.
I particularly found your own version (the first one of the two) exceptionally erotic. The level of control you apply to each layer of humiliation is exquisite. The reference to ‘it’s waterproof’ is beautiful in its disregard for her ‘feelings’ on the subject, and therefore becomes the height of humiliation for her, dehumanising her to that of ‘it’ rather than her or she.
I can see the Alpha cuckold element veined throughout that fantasy, layer upon layer of erotic humiliation, hers, as she is feeding your erotic mind with man after man after man taking her and using her, doing whatever they want to her with impunity, while you watch her debase herself entirely for your gratification and therefore her own, as it is ultimately her fantasy that is being played out. Of course, as we have already discussed, you would be the only man in that room for her regardless of how many cocks were being used on her, in her, how much cum is splashed over her, none of that matters to her, they are tools to be used for the fulfillment of your shared fantasy. Her complete submission to her lover and the knowledge that she is giving you everything she possibly can in this level of debasement is what will drive her to take everything you demand of her. It transcends submission and takes her to an entirely new, erotically fuelled, mindspace. Minds that are entwined and in sync to that level are an explosive combination.
It is a very interesting subject and you have captured the essence of the erotic humiliation and energy swirls of those lovers whose sexual needs and desires take them to the very edge of everything to gain that explosive experience with each other. I thoroughly enjoyed re-reading this post. It reminded me once again, what a beautifully erotic, naughty mind you have michael!💎😈💋😘
The problem is, it’s not a fantasy, it happens to women in real life without our consent or knowledge. Women are treated nothing more than a sex object on a daily basis. I’m sure many women would consent to fantasy but men prefer to keep us chasing our tail while they destroy our mental health and cheat!!
This is a fairly well established sexual kink/fantasy (for some women). For these women, even if experienced in real life, it is consensual and happens because they want it to happen. If it happens without consent and not experienced by a woman as part of her sexual pleasure, it is obviously wrong. Also, while your personal experience may differ, I world argue that it isn’t true to say all men want to destroy the mental health of women and cheat.