As my relationship with Sienna is unfolding, it is clear her sexual fantasies center around being submissive. As for me, cuckolding is a personal favorite. Nothing makes me hotter than my girl being in love with me and also wanting to experience another man’s bigger cock. At first pass, it may appear that our fantasies are in conflict but this is largely due to misperceptions about cuckolding.
Cuckolding is often portrayed as a dominant female/submissive male relationship also know as Femdom or female led relationships (FLR) but it doesn’t have to be (and often isn’t) that way. In my popular Cuckolding vs. Femdom essay, I untangle these two fantasies from one another and show how they are actually very distinct fantasies that can exist (and often do) independent of one another. Essentially, I make the case that any power play found in cuckolding is actually an additional fantasy layered onto cuckolding.
Ultimately, labels really don’t matter – a couple finds their erotic sweet spot and simply enjoys what they enjoy. That said, a significant part of my blog is devoted to educating women about cuckolding, correcting misconceptions, and helping them understand why it might be a fun kink to explore with their lover…even as just a fantasy. This is why labels are important to me – they help frame and define the discussion.
If a woman were to google cuckolding or check out cuckold videos on a porn site, the sad reality is that what you will find probably isn’t the type of cuckold experience your lover (if he wants you to be with other men) desires. Frankly, it probably won’t be appealing to you either. What you will likely see is Femdom, male submission, and erotic humiliation masquerading as cuckolding. All of those are fine but they aren’t cuckolding. The deep emotional connection of the couple and powerful erotic swirl of another man joining your special union is completely absent. Porn’s false projections of cuckolding, without fail, miss the true essence of cuckolding – the couple’s loving, erotic connection.
Anecdotally, it seems to me that if women are into sexual power play, more women would fall on the side of being sexually submissive rather than wanting to be the dominant partner. However, being a submissive female doesn’t rule out cuckolding for the couple. For example, the cuck could be submissive and the women could find a dominant bull to help tap into her submissive desires. If you prefer that your primary partner be dominant, there are plenty of Doms that get off thinking about their lover with another man. And, it isn’t unusual to find submissive women who are intrigued by the thought of being with other men within the boundaries of a D/s relationship. Cuckolding, whether admitted to or not because of its often misplaced negative connotations in the BDSM community, is at play in these situations. It may be secondary to D/s, but it is there.
My early experience with Sienna is a great example of how cuckolding can play out for a woman with submissive fantasies. Even as Sienna begins to be more open with me and others about her sexual desire to experience a well-hung black man, she sees this as a form of submission to me. She explains her perspective in the rest of this post. As a reminder, I do enjoy a bit of erotic humiliation (especially small penis teasing) and you may notice Sienna pushing on that erotic hot button a few times.
Cuckolding: A Submissive Woman’s Perspective
Sweetheart, you are my amazing, sexy Man and I LOVE you! And, I LOVE your cock…MY sweet, little white cock! Baby, this is why we are so perfect together. Well, it is one of many, many reasons but one of the physical reasons we are perfect together. Your little cock fits my little pussy and tight space so PERFECTLY!!! Yet, your size makes me yearn for MORE – a bigger, longer, thicker, and darker cock! Of course, this yearning is only for the contrast and our naughty fun.
Sweet Love, it is important to me that the other man knows how much I love, adore and respect you. I want him to know that you are not “less than” in my eyes. This is one of the big reasons I’m so uncomfortable about having some random black guy with a big cock taking me. Yes, he will fuck me and it will be hot, but it isn’t about me and him. It is all about OUR experience…it’s about you and me!
This is why I’m so, so, so excited about Jalen. He knows how special and amazing we are together and what all of this naughtiness means to us. He has read our love stories and understands our deep connection. He knows and understands the passion, lust, and love we have for one another. It’s so important to me that the other man knows this. You are my Daddy, and I am YOUR girl, not his!
In living this fantasy, I submit to YOUR desire for me to be fucked by a tall, muscular, hung black man. I could have experienced this at any point in my life before you but I didn’t. Now, I want to experience this as an act of submission to you for US. It makes me so hot thinking about you telling me to take out his huge cock and the other naughty things that you will tell me to do or direct to have happen.
Whether I am sucking his big cock or he is fucking me good, I am submitting to your direction. I do it for you, not for him. I do it to him, to please you. You are in charge of my sexual pleasure even if you bring in another man to give it to me!
My deepest form of submission is to you, Daddy – you are the man I love with all my soul! You are the one directing and telling your girl that you want me to have a bigger, thicker more fulfilling cock. You are allowing another man to stretch and fill my pussy to the max! To please you Daddy, I am allowing a black man to thrust and bury his black cock deep in my pussy and give me more than I have ever experienced before.
It’s an exhilarating rush of naughty submission that I never imagined possible as you push my submission and sexuality to new limits. This is such a naughty contrast to my reality. People me would be SHOCKED to know I have such naughty dark cravings and something about that makes me so hot!
Experiencing a bigger, darker, thicker cock is also such a contrast to your beautiful but smaller white cock. Just thinking about it makes me gush with silky wetness!
There is another erotic twist in this fantasy that is also such a turn on. This man will think he has it all and is controlling the scenario. He knows he can provide me with the deep, physically fulfilling pleasure I have been craving. He will think he has his sexy white girl now. He might even see himself as the center of my universe and believe that you will become nothing and inferior in my eyes. He will be so wrong!
The impetus for me is what it is for US! It’s all about OUR pleasure seeking for US! He plays a role that is not about the intimate, adoring love, and deep connection we have. He’s only there for our fun, captivating naughtiness. What can’t be taken and won over is the deep, heartfelt, and connecting love we have fostered and treasure. Mmmmm, this is my secret and real depiction of our fantasy and our true love, Daddy!
- Cuckold Psychology – The Essentials – Essential writings exploring the erotic drivers and psychology of cuckolding
- Sensual Shadows – Chronology – The chronology, brief story descriptions, and links to my loving, erotic journey with Sienna