Black Mystique – Mandingo is the first in a short series exploring the underlying psychology of interracial sex as kink – specifically black men and white women. Along the way, I will also try to unravel how my fantasy of wanting to watch my lover with a black man evolved during my sexual journey. This is a work in progress and will likely undergo several iterations as I work through this complex topic.
I’d like to begin by making an important distinction between interracial relationships in general and interracial sex as a kink. The former refers to people falling in love without regard to ethnic differences and is a beautiful, loving experience. The latter sexualizes and eroticizes ethnic differences, and this is the focus of my exploration. The interracial sex fetish flows both ways and isn’t only the sexual fetishization of black men by “some” white people. There are also “some” black men that fetishize white women in general and white wives in particular. Each derives added sexual pleasure from the interracial layers of these sexual liaisons.
How popular is this kink? Cuckolding and interracial sex are separate fetishes but they are often intertwined in sexual fantasies and, as the following data suggests, very popular. Neuroscientists Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam analyzed one billion sex-related search terms as research for their 2012 book, A Billion Wicked Thoughts. They found that cuckold-related searches rank #2 among most searched for sexual content on the internet. Ogas and Gaddam drilled down even deeper. After gaining access to the database of a popular cuckold erotica site, they identified the following as the most common two-word search phrases: Black Cock #1, Black Man #2, and Big Black (Cock) #6.
Some people will casually assert that interracial sex and interracial cuckolding is based on racism. To be fair, I have seen interracial content where such claims may be justifiable. One anecdotal example of this is something I began to notice several years ago in some of the more extreme interracial content coming from Europe. This content often flows around mass immigration from Africa, the “breeding” of white females by black men, and the conquest of Europe as its women submit to men of a more virile tribe.
There is obviously some concern about immigration and its impact on European cultural that is being eroticized. I suspect there is also an element of erotic humiliation driving the fantasy related to emasculation and male submission. However, there is nothing about that type of content that is appealing for women or the men who love those women. It is a different energy all together and is not about interracial cuckolding within a loving relationship.
In contrast, I will make the case that for the majority of women, men, and couples who are actually drawn to interracial sex, the allure of the Black Mystique is not based on racism. At its core, I believe the psychology of this fantasy is driven by societal repression of innate human sexual desires coupled with the desire to break free from societal constraints. While my focus is on how these desires are expressed through interracial sex, I hope you will also appreciate that this is but one outlet of expression. Many sexual kinks, such as BDSM, may also find their psychological roots in the same soil – responses to sexual repression and societal constraints.
My first exposure to interracial sex provides a relevant backdrop for exploring the black mystique. As a boy, I was at friend’s house and we were staying up way too late and saw a film was titled Mandingo. It was set in the Old South (pre-Civil War America) and was a story about a Mandingo slave. He was physically imposing and it was made apparent throughout the movie that he was also very well endowed. This caught the attention and imagination of women (white and black) throughout the plantation.
My enduring memory of this movie (in addition to first becoming aware that slavery had once existed) was the scene where the sexually repressed and frustrated plantation wife brings the Mandingo into her bedroom for sex. I remember him being on top of her…the sight of his dark muscular hips thrusting powerfully between her pale white legs. Her reactions and expressions were like nothing I had ever seen before. It was a very powerful visual. My first sexual visuals and memories now involved a muscular black man with a large cock fucking a white woman. It left a very arousing impression.
I had never even seen or thought about this type of relationship. Part of my naivety was that I was still so young. It was cultural too. Growing up in the South, there weren’t a lot of interracial couples around. I also remember feeling tremendous empathy for black people. I had childhood friends that were black. We played sports together, rode bikes, did sleepovers, and all the things kids do together. We had no awareness of this history. I remember feeling ashamed and hoping they never found out about slavery. White guilt? Perhaps.
I would learn later that slavery wasn’t only a black or American experience. White people were commonly enslaved throughout Europe when armies were defeated or regions were conquered. The Roman Empire, for example, had millions of white slaves from Europe. Even a cursory look at the history of slavery shows that it has existed all over the world.
One inescapable aspect of Mandingo is the period of racism in which it takes place and the “taboo” nature of the sex scene. The seemingly off-limits, morally pure, angelic plantation wife was supposed to be above such primal, animalistic desires like sexual pleasure.
She rises from deep within us…like an inherited dream of divine perfection. She is exalted, worshipped, and placed high upon a pedestal. She comes in many forms based on cultural differences but, in all cases, she is the divine projection from our soul of the perfect woman. Her name is Anima.
The romanticized notion of Courtly Love was still alive and well in the antebellum South. A woman of stature should not be degraded with sexual intercourse. She was above this and it was wrong for her to crave sex. She was placed on a pedestal of moral purity. Men of this period tried to honor Courtly Love as well by not defiling their angelic wives. Instead, they found other ways to fulfill their decadent sexual cravings. Women had no such release.
Deep down inside though, men knew women had sexual desires and this desire needed to be kept in check. While white men tried to interact with white women in a chivalrous way that honored Courtly Love (and that man’s vision of his own Anima), sexuality was still present on plantations and the sexual desires of white women needed to be deterred. As part of this deterrence, black men were cast in a negative light. They were labeled as hyper-sexual with enormous cocks that would ruin a white girl for future suitors. What these black men allegedly wanted more than anything was to ravage and (figuratively) split a white woman in two with their oversized cocks and were dangerous. This was supposed to be a deterrent but, for a sexually repressed woman, these claims actually served as erotic stimulus carrying the promise of sexual fulfillment.
So, here is the tricky part that addresses the issue of interracial sex and racism. Remember, men of this time and even today often want to cast the woman they marry or wish to marry as angelic and pure. In a time of slavery and explicit racism, the sexual mythology of the black male and the big black cock takes root. However, the emergence of white women (and women of many ethnicities) fantasizing and craving big black cock isn’t a racist desire. No, her desire stems from sexual repression and the craving of sexual fulfillment that she could not get from her lover.
Her sexual liberation and freedom would be best expressed by having sex with a black man. Again, it is not because she is racist, it is because the black man now carried the archetypal energy of raw sexuality and offers the promise of everything she is being denied – sexual fulfillment and transcendent ecstasy. She is rebelling against societal constraints that deny her sexual fulfillment. On a personal level, I have said and written thousands of times that I view my lover’s desire for big black cock as her desire to experience and embrace the fullness of her sexuality – figuratively and literally.
The Black Mystique extends across the world now and is no longer an American experience. It is beyond psychological connections to slavery and the injustices found in early American history. It’s origins are more primal. The Black Mystique reflects an innate human dream with roots to dawn of humanity – sexual desire – that has called to women of all nationalities and ancient tribes throughout the ages. I will explore this “innate human dream” in Black Mystique – Kneeling at the Altar.
- Cuckold Corner – The Interviews: This is a series of posts where I interview men and women who enjoy interracial sex and cuckolding. These are more erotic reads because people are sharing their fantasies. This page offers short descriptions of the interviews and links to the full interviews.
- Cuckold Psychology – A series of posts dealing with the psychology of cuckolding: Introduction, Mind Bender, Sperm Wars, Cuckold vs. FemDom, Erotic Humiliation, The Other Man’s Cum, and Wife Breeding
- Sensual Shadows – Chronology & Links This is a personal journey into interracial cuckolding with a former lover. It includes love stories along with erotic posts detailing our journey into interracial cuckolding.